We are all as busy as ever trying to fit as much as we can into 24 hours & often I think the important things suffer as a result. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to sound like Oprah here & Jeremy Kyle gives me a headache but putting time and effort into a relationship is just as important as posting on Instagram, going to the gym and building a career. I've not got the perfect relationship & I think it's hard to find anyone who is in one but I think I do understand whats important and what isn't when it comes to being a couple in the fast-paced 21st century.
1. Quality time - Sounds pretty obvious but just because we know it's important doesn't mean it's easy to achieve. Juggling work, housework, children, a social life and hobbies means it becomes too easy to count sleeping in the same bed at night as quality time with our partners. I've heard of others struggling to find time to see their partners when they live apart & I can vouch that just because two people live together doesn't mean they get anymore quality time - in fact sometimes I think it's harder. I believe making the effort to spend time together once a week, a fortnight or even monthly can make a huge difference to a relationship. Whether its a meal out, a meal at home at the table, a cinema trip or a walk in the woods, being able to relax & spend time with each other can go a long way. I enjoy eating out & shopping (what woman doesn't?) and Paul enjoys the outdoors so canoeing, climbing, bike rides etc so between us we regularly do one or the other in order to escape the stress of everyday life and enjoy each others company. At the beginning of a relationship all you seem to do is spend time with each other, dating and meeting up so why not keep it up throughout the relationship? Also ladies, I find it's a great way to get dressed up, whack some lippy on and feel good about yourself (and of course he will LOVE the effort too).
2. Being Comfortable - I hope I speak for most of us (otherwise this is awfully embarrassing) when reflecting on the early days in a relationship where I spoke like I wasn't from Plymouth - didn't last long... GREEN ARMY!, would chew my food properly and eat about one pea at a time, give myself awful stomach ache by holding in wind and supporting the myth that ladies don't poo *Gasps* all in aid of giving a wonderful impression of myself - go me! Regardless of the fact that approximately six hours earlier Paul would have seen me chow down a kebab in 4.7 seconds, have an eyelash half hanging off, repeat the same nonsense story 38 times and fall over multiple times whilst thinking I was Beyonce in Walkabout - such a classy person. My point is, although I feel we practically all go through this stage in a relationship, eventually we all surrender and reveal our true, annoying, noisy, smelly colours so don't drag it out too long - you'll more than likely find they prefer your normal self which they will see after a few sambuccas anyway.
3. Judge & Jury - We all need a vent sometimes, whether its because your partners left his dirty socks on the floor AGAIN despite you telling him four times the night before not to do it or bigger things such as leaving his socks AND his boxers 3 feet away from the washing basket, sometimes it feels better to moan to the girls, your parents or a random person on the street - I'm sure it's happened. The important thing to remember is, whilst you have a moan and a cry and gain some support from the girls, the most natural & understandable thing for them to then do is judge. Not deliberately, but straight away they're more than likely to back your corner and tell you you can do so much better or advise you to throw all of his things out of the window like a scene from Eastenders. The reason why this happens is more than likely because they care and don't like you being upset but just remember when he does eventually put his socks in the laundry and things are dandy again, the people you confided in are unlikely to forget as quickly as you did. I'm not sitting here saying never tell anybody anything else they'll immediately think he or she is a low life for upsetting you or causing problems because we all need someone to speak to as I said earlier. But what I am saying is, all in moderation. Have a moan, but maybe not every time there's a problem. If you can sort it then sort it between yourselves. It's a horrible feeling when someone isn't liked or feels judged because of something that happened within a relationship between two people and lets face it, it's only a matter of time before you'll be able to see when whats app messages have been screenshotted - Oh Shit.
4. Communication - Some people say its the most important thing in a relationship & I understand why. It's good to talk, share thoughts and feelings but I think the trouble at the minute is people rely on social media to communicate and although an 'I love you' text half way through the day whilst doing the housework is always a good pick -me - up, constantly using mobiles or tablets to talk is never as good as face to face. Whether you're both in the best of moods and want to drown each other in soppiness or have a debate about who's doing the dishes, I think social media and mobile phones get used far to often. If you have a row, sort it face to face. If you constantly text all day "I'm just having a wee babes" when you do see each other is there anything left to talk about? I love nothing more than either me or Paul coming home from work, seeing each other, sitting down and having a massive yap, moan or laugh about our days and although I love social media and use it daily myself, I definitely think for relationships, keep it old fashioned.
5. Nooky - Being busy, tired, stressed are all reasons why the last thing we want to think about sometimes is getting down and dirty in the bedroom but as with quality time, its still important to make the effort just as much as in the beginning of the relationship. Be spontaneous & outrageous but don't get arrested.
So, there it is. My five 'acknowledgements' if you like, as to how to enjoy a healthy, happy relationship in this crazy world we live in. As I said, I'm not Oprah and each relationship is different. Always do what's best for you and not for other people as cringey as it sounds. I'm a sucker for romance - Dirty Dancing is my all time favourite - so if you have a wonderful love story or anything you think you can add then let me know!
Love M I C H A E L A x
Image from Pinterest: mickieblight
The better halves birthday
Firstly please let me apologise for the lack of blogposts recently but it was that time in the academic year when every piece of work was due in so it was only acceptable to eat my body weight in food and not see the outside world for six days straight, combine that with work and its safe to say its lucky I haven't developed rickets and gained five stone. As much as I tried to keep up with blogging, revising research methods and writing an essay on festival authenticity was far more interesting - sense the sarcasm? BUT it was all worth it as I found out yesterday I've passed second year so I can now give my blog my undivided attention & hopefully have lots to write about.
Through the mad past few weeks as you may have guessed nothing too exciting has been occurring although it was my much better halves birthday (age not disclosed) and seeing as he always seems to pull out all of the stops for mine I thought I'd best return the favour *Cringe* *Passes sick bag* His birthday fell on a Saturday this year and being a weekend slave meant taking some time off work so we could spend the day doing whatever Paul wanted to do - luckily I didn't regret this. We often go on little adventures as we like to call them as Paul loves the outdoors and I enjoy learning new things and getting involved (This isn't a love story - promise) so his birthday was always going to be another adventure.
With it being such a lovely day - we do get sunshine sometimes - we decided to go canoeing on the River Yealm about a 30 minute drive from home. Parking at the lovely little village Noss Mayo, Paul carries the canoe down to the water along with three bags of survival kit as I stand around taking selfies and occasionally pictures of the stunning views as we get on the water. I've never been a huge fan of river/sea and any slight wobble usually causes me to deep breath and say my prayers. Or my vivid imagination runs away with me and all of a sudden I'm expecting a 14 foot shark with 3000 teeth and six eyes to jump out of the water and eat me and my ginger hair alive. Luckily Paul loves the water and after reassuring me approximately 65 times that we won't sink, capsize or be eaten alive we always have a lovely canoe. On this occasion, as the water was so calm and quiet we ventured out of the Yealm and around to a secluded beach for a flask of tea and some trail mix - like an old married couple already. I would always highly recommend taking a trip out there whether its hiring a boat, paddle boarding, canoeing, kayaking, a long walk or a visit to the local pub, you won't be disappointed (I should work in sales).
Birthday breakfast at Elviras, Plymouth
Mewstone, Wembury
Secluded beach, Wembury
Noss Mayo, Sunset
Noss Mayo
In the evening, Paul and I were treated to a meal by Paul's parents to celebrate him collecting his first pension. We went to the popular italian restaurant 'Prezzo' which we always enjoy because of the food and the views as well as the fact that Tesco clubcard vouchers can be spent there - winning.
Even though I swear he's the easiest person to buy for - something I am eternally grateful for - I wanted to get him a meaningful present that I knew he'd really enjoy and appreciate. That, and I don't think we have room for any more climbing ropes, canoes, harnesses, rucksacks etc. - in case you're wondering, he is the person to go to in the case of a zombie apocolypse. With travel plans being discussed, we've both got the urge to travel & although Paul's already been a few years ago, we both separately mentioned how we wanted to go. Therefore for his birthday present I surprised him with a four night stay in Amsterdam flying out this Sunday. The city has become a popular place to visit and has a lot to do and explore. I thought I'd be a little creative in giving Paul his present so printed off clues that linked to the city such as Heineken, an Anne Frank book, a bicycle, a cannabis leaf etc and put them in the gift box and it ended with him thinking I was taking him to Germany followed by the Caribbean bless his uneducated soul - just kidding.
Love M I C H A E L A x
Drunk Personalities
Whether it's been planned for weeks or was arranged in the last five minutes whilst having a pizza and film night in - there is always an excuse for a girls night out which is guaranteed to involve waaaay to much alcohol, 500 second long snapchat stories and one hell of a disgusting hangover the next day where you are left contemplating your whole life. What I love most about a girls night as well as dancing, drinking and dribbling is the girls I go out with and their unique contribution to the whole night out experience. (Girls - I'll let you decide who is who)
Image courtesy of Pinterest: mickieblight
The Alcoholic - Often seen front row at the bar entertaining a dozen sambuccas, the alcoholic of the group (not literally btw) is always guaranteed to drink everyone in the chosen establishment under the table - as well as probably ending up there. Minesweeps drinks a lot better than I can play the computer game and is never seen without a drink in their hand - even a VK is an option as although it rots your teeth and could potentially ruin your street cred, alcohol is alcohol right?
The Sap - So you've had a few drinks and it suddenly dawns on you how much you love your life and everyone in it. You cannot believe you have such amazing friends and feel its only right to thank each and every one of them for being such a special part of your life. This group member can often be found in the ladies toilets befriending another female who they've never met and repeatedly complementing them on their outfit, hairstyle, figure, eyeshadow, MAC lipstick, shoes, nail polish, choice of profession, their chosen name for their child, life choices - you get the picture. Warning - will frequently need rescuing.
The Mum - Would more than likely refer to a night on the tiles as a day in the life of Mother Teresa (without the famous attire) as they rally around taking registers at each destination and ensuring everyone is having a smashing time. If a group member happens to be taken unwell (due to the flu they still haven't gotten over from 5 weeks ago - nothing to do with the alcohol of course) then it is always the mother's duty to hold back the hair, wipe the chin and prevent general face planting of the toilet rim.
The Horndog - Lock up your sons! ( OR nephew, cousin, brother, anything with a pulse) as this member of the gang is always on the hunt for fresh meat. Often spotted eyeing up their prey whilst seductively sipping on their vodka lime and soda (Fewest calories - yay!) or alternatively humping door frames, table legs - hey - when Chris Brown's playing, anything will do in assisting the twerking slut drop grinding dance moves required to pull a stud.
The Louis Spence - The only girl in the group who is likely to burn more calories dancing than they actually drink. Whether its the UK number one, or Is this the way to Amarillo, they will be on that dance floor showing the world how outrageous it is that they haven't been selected to be on the next series of Strictly Come Dancing! Dancing may only be interrupted if an alcoholic beverage needs to be purchased or nature calls and even then if it can be solved on the dance floor then it will - just kidding.
Image courtesy of Pinterest: mickieblight
The Invisible - they are involved in the planning process, discuss outfit options, are present at pre-drinks, are with you in the taxi and then BOOM - completely disappear as soon as you get in the club, never to be seen or heard from until the next morning where its common to remind each other how you've potentially ruined your life the night before. On the odd occasion you may see them in the distance through the crowd but unless you are brave enough to potentially ruin true love (its always true love in Walkabout) its best to steer well clear.
The Fighter - It's always reassuring to be able to go on a night out knowing you practically have a personal security guard who is willing to sort someone out if they need sorting out. Rest assured if that girl over there looks at you funny or bumps into you whilst dancing, their is always a friend who's got your back and is willing to sacrifice their cheesy chips if it means them being pleasantly rubbed into your opponents hair extensions.
The Weekend Millionaire - Champagne lifestyle on lemonade wages is common for the girl who insists on buying a round everywhere you go, every time you go out. Oh and it won't just be one drink, it'll have to be accompanied with a side of flaming Sambuca (watch the drawn on eyebrows) just to ensure every single person gets pleasantly pissed. They will then more than likely not be able to afford the taxi fare home or will go into hibernation for the next four weeks until they receive another Schweppes payment.
The Comedian- You cannot beat a bit of free entertainment on a night out and there always seems to be the comedian of the group who you can always rely on to bring the goods. Whether it be witty banter or outrageous dance moves such as the funky chicken they are more than happy to pretend to be head over heels in love with you to save you from pitiful chat up lines. It may just be a local thing, but comparing me to Google because i'm 'everything they've been searching for' doesn't quite do it for me - I know, i'm so hard to please.
The Cryer - So several drinks later this individual suddenly starts thinking about all the terrible things that are occurring in the world such as Harry Styles being voted 3rd sexiest male in the Braille Magazine (haha, only kidding - but - seriously?!) OR the dreaded 500 word essay due in two days time that you haven't even acknowledged existed and all of a sudden the floodgates open. Gone are the false eyelashes that took three tantrums to get perfect but instead replaced with awful facial expressions that even contouring can't help. This then leads to mission 'get back on track' as they're rushed into the toilet for some girl therapy and retouching whilst being convinced that another drink will most definitely solve any problem.
So next time you're out with the girls or reflecting on your last drunken weekend, have a think and just for fun, see who you think represents each personality. Personally I think I have represented each one of these at some point over the years - not my greatest achievement - I once served Les Dennis breakfast.
Love M I C H A E L A x
P.S Here's a glimpse of some of the cuties I hang out with -
Some images courtesy of smilesonthetiles.com
Results with Lucy Online Fitness Programme with Missguided Active
Going to the gym, working out and posing for selfies in gym clothes (come on – we all do it!) has become a mahoosive deal recently. I remember a time where I wouldn’t been seen dead in gym leggings with fluorescent bits down the side topped off with chunky running trainers that look like your feet are twice the size of what they actually are and now I’m constantly online or in shops hunting for another set of gym wear to show off.
I first joined ‘The Gym’ a couple of years ago after a girls holiday to mental Maga was booked and whilst I felt I made progress I soon became a bit bored and didn’t have a consistent gym buddy to go with. It wasn’t long before I was snapchatting more than I was squatting and spending more time buying gym clothes than actually training in them. I also struggled with motivation – one week I would healthy eat as religiously as the Pope attends church and other weeks I would eat a whole chocolate trifle to myself and not even feel guilty about the 6000 calories I’d just consumed. I’d always tell myself I’d work it off and would cheat more than our premiership footballers (Ouch!) so this New Year I jumped well and truly onto the bandwagon and decided it was time for a change.
I’m not 100% happy with my body and am always aiming to improve it, as I know a lot of people are and wanted a way to work out which was flexible due to a juggling schedule of uni, work and some sort of social life. After seeing evidence of ‘RealResults’ online, I became massively intrigued with Lucy Mecklenburghs ‘Results with Lucy’ and soon became as big a fan as I am of TOWIE *cringe*. The pictures online of peoples success all over the country were impressive and were achieved in a realistic space of time – not only that, the pictures of what Lucy Meck had achieved was enough to depress me and motivate me into wanting her figure (boohoo). I’d previously bought Charlotte Crosby’s 3 minute belly blitz DVD ( I am such a reality programme reject) which was a brilliant workout but because its only a DVD, it became repetitive and I slowly found myself making up dire excuses as to why I couldn’t do it – ‘ I think I may have a headache tomorrow’ or ‘better save my energy for crying at tonight’s Eastenders, Masterchef (it’s happened), One born every minute – you get the picture.
Results with Lucy has a variety of plans to purchase and choose from depending on what you aim to achieve eg. Wobble to model, Six Pack Abs and New Beginnings. I subscribed to the ‘Solo’ plan and pay less than £10.00 a month (perks of being a student – oh and the massive debt) which is cheaper than my gym membership fee and offers SO much more variety. It’s all online, so you just log in, pick a workout video and do it; I make it sound so easy! As well as the common workouts for abs and ass (on every women’s Christmas list), there is also dancing, ballet, yoga, gymnastics, antenatal workouts and you can even learn to do the splits (Haven’t tried this one yet as I’m not confident I’ll get back up off the floor). You can pick workouts or select playlists that have been put together – this is my preference as they keep me motivated to do all 11 videos without stopping and are guaranteed to get you sweaty - Tip: Although exercise is said to be good on a hangover, the hangover workout playlist is more likely to make you board the chunder train than get off it.
The online fitness programme also features an ‘EAT WELL’ section with recipes and healthy eating tips to ensure the best possible results. I’d also recommend Lucy’s book ‘Be Body Beautiful’ (she’s not paying me for this I promise) which includes recipes, exercises and interesting information about food and exercise.
In order to get the most from ‘Results with Lucy’, it would be a good idea to buy some weights that suit you – I use 3kg - I am Ginger and am meant to be 10% stronger than the average human – a gym ball, a kettlebell, a hula hoop and a fitness mat as laminate flooring is cold and carpet burns hurt (I learnt the hard way). My favourite workouts or exercises include: Plank rotations, Russian twists, squats, squat pulses, kettlebell swings & hula hoop whereas my most dreaded exercises that I’m learning to love are tricep dips, burpees and lunges.
I’ve always been a fan of Missguided and often spend my hard earned monies ordering from them so I was happier than a slinky on an escalator when I heard they were releasing an ‘Active’ range of fitness clothing. I couldn’t resist ordering and even won a competition for my haul (Go me!) and I have to say it’s my favourite work out gear (They aren’t paying me either) as it’s comfy, fits well and looks good!
So if you’re looking to get fit and have fun then I couldn’t recommend Results with Lucy enough! Lucy and her team are encouraging throughout the workouts and fully explain each exercise and what muscles and area they target so you fully understand what your doing – I suppose it always helps! I’m no expert and am far from having the status ‘Gym Bunny’ but this programme is the best by far for me and results speak for themselves. If you also train with Results with Lucy or have any workout tips – let me know!
Love M I C H A E L A x
Outfit: Missguided Active
Photographer: Paul Neale
Location: Saltram, Plymouth
P.S Here's a few tips I try and always remember:
- Being skinny doesn't mean healthy
- Eating breakfast helps you to lose weight as it kickstarts your metabolism
- Muscle weighs more than fat so when training try measuring yourself instead of using the dreaded scales
- Exercise gives you energy! It doesn't take it all!
- Exercise releases endorphins which make us happy!
"Suck it up now or suck it in later"
The Life of a Ginger
"I don't care what it is as long as it's not ginger!" were the famous words my mum announced before I was welcomed into the world 22 years ago. Harsh you may think? I would have once agreed with you. However, since I now feel I have managed to eventually climb out of my 'biscuit tin', I now adore my red (ginger) locks more than ever before.
I have never been one to correct people in stating my hair as being 'Strawberry Blonde' - Does that colour even exist?! - however I have been known to refer to the term 'Auburn Sunset' once in a while. If any fellow redheads are reading this then I'm sure you can relate when I state that school days were the worst days when it came to being called a 'Ginger Minge'? The name calling was always bad but became more tedious as the years went on like yeah I've heard that one - oh that's the third time today I've heard that! Anything else? They say with age comes wisdom which became evident as I ventured into my sixth form years when the odd compliment would make its way through the constant game of spot the obvious. However this soon became boring - I mean - now I was hearing people say they'd love to be ginger; 'I wish I had your hair colour' 'I'm so jealous!' The term 'Prove it!' would pop into my head on numerous occasions.
By now you may have noticed that being ginger involves a lot of repetition and long may it continue. By the time I started my second part time job at 'Asders' (or Asda for those of you not from Plymouth), I can happily say the compliments increased as customers would comment on my beautiful hair, often asking me if it was natural etc. The main comment that always stuck with me was when customers (mainly elderly) would tell me how people would pay a fortune to have my hair colour. I've not heard of developing physic powers as we grow old gracefully, however funnily enough the ginger trend soon came around which saw girls of all ages attempting to dye their hair 'Auburn Sunset' (I agree, it does sound like a cocktail). I saw many successes and failures of the ginger boom which saw the most recent trend of Ombre hair producing even more redheads whether that be deliberate or not! *Hand over face*
Now with redheads set to be taking over the world (according to National Geographic we're meant to be non-existent come 2050 however that's another blog post in itself) I feel now more than ever before is the best time to be a complete natural redhead and be proud of it. Laugh at the remarks because I promise it won't be long until you're blushing at the compliments just as often and if all else fails, punch them right in the face as its guaranteed to hurt (Were also meant to be 10% stronger than the average human) GO TEAM GINGE!
Love M I C H A E L A x
"I don't care what it is as long as it's not ginger!" were the famous words my mum announced before I was welcomed into the world 22 years ago. Harsh you may think? I would have once agreed with you. However, since I now feel I have managed to eventually climb out of my 'biscuit tin', I now adore my red (ginger) locks more than ever before.
I have never been one to correct people in stating my hair as being 'Strawberry Blonde' - Does that colour even exist?! - however I have been known to refer to the term 'Auburn Sunset' once in a while. If any fellow redheads are reading this then I'm sure you can relate when I state that school days were the worst days when it came to being called a 'Ginger Minge'? The name calling was always bad but became more tedious as the years went on like yeah I've heard that one - oh that's the third time today I've heard that! Anything else? They say with age comes wisdom which became evident as I ventured into my sixth form years when the odd compliment would make its way through the constant game of spot the obvious. However this soon became boring - I mean - now I was hearing people say they'd love to be ginger; 'I wish I had your hair colour' 'I'm so jealous!' The term 'Prove it!' would pop into my head on numerous occasions.
By now you may have noticed that being ginger involves a lot of repetition and long may it continue. By the time I started my second part time job at 'Asders' (or Asda for those of you not from Plymouth), I can happily say the compliments increased as customers would comment on my beautiful hair, often asking me if it was natural etc. The main comment that always stuck with me was when customers (mainly elderly) would tell me how people would pay a fortune to have my hair colour. I've not heard of developing physic powers as we grow old gracefully, however funnily enough the ginger trend soon came around which saw girls of all ages attempting to dye their hair 'Auburn Sunset' (I agree, it does sound like a cocktail). I saw many successes and failures of the ginger boom which saw the most recent trend of Ombre hair producing even more redheads whether that be deliberate or not! *Hand over face*
Now with redheads set to be taking over the world (according to National Geographic we're meant to be non-existent come 2050 however that's another blog post in itself) I feel now more than ever before is the best time to be a complete natural redhead and be proud of it. Laugh at the remarks because I promise it won't be long until you're blushing at the compliments just as often and if all else fails, punch them right in the face as its guaranteed to hurt (Were also meant to be 10% stronger than the average human) GO TEAM GINGE!
Love M I C H A E L A x
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